July 25, 2007 || Baltika / First Exam

This will have to be quick, since I'm trying to squeeze this in between exams and meeting with Masha (for what I hope will not be the last time!), and I'm not on my computer. This week (y'all must be getting so tired of hearing this) has been super busy.. on Monday and Tuesday we had our last days of class, with a little bit of preparation for our exams, and then on Wednesday we traveled alllll the way to the edge of Saint Petersburg (literally--we went off my map) to tour the factory of Baltika. Baltika is the most popular beer here in Russia--once, I saw the same beer commercial for Baltika No. 7 (and another beer) play one right after the other, 7 in a row, during one commercial break. To give a quick rundown, Baltikas signature beers come from No. 0 (no alcohol) to No. 9 (strongest), although they lack a No. 1 (as I slightly tipsily quipped during our tasting session, "Because ALL Baltika is Number 1!"). They have Baltika at every restaurant, bar, and kiosk in Russia, and everyone has a favorite "number." I can't quite describe how widespread Baltika is; maybe statistics will help: over 30% of all beer consumed in Russia is Baltika beer. So, clearly it makes sense that they have a ginormous factory.
The first thing I noticed about the factory complex was that one of the buildings was oddly-shaped, and covered with a mural of horses. Inside, one of the murals in the main lobby depicted a big wagon being drawn by horses. "Hmmm," I thought. "That looks familiar." (Budweiser knock-off anyone?) When I questioned Neil about the horses, he confirmed that the horses were a Baltika trademark AND that they LIVED in the big, rounded building I saw (a barn!) AND during the tours in the winter, you could see them! But alas, it was not winter, and I had to console myself with just beer. The first room of note we entered (no pictures allowed inside, of course) was filled with massive, gigantic, impossibly huge tanks full of beer that were kept so cool that ice formed on their metal outsides and we shivered, even under the heat lamp in our separate corridor running among them. These huge tanks stretched up to the ceiling maybe 50 feet and another 50 feet down to the floor (I'm a bad judge of distance, though) and just went on endlessly it seemed on either side of us. Again to illustrate: if you took all the beer in these containers, bottled it, and stood it around the world at the Earth's equator, it would ring the Earth 13 times. We moved on to a room where there were big brass cauldrons--what for, I'm not sure--and eventually made our way to the bottling area, which to me was the most fun thing to watch. There's something about a factory like that... everything smooth-running, the glasses tinkling together, here they get filled with beer, here (impossibly fast) they snap away, capped, there they get a label pasted on, then separated into different groups so they can be plastic-wrapped, shot with a shrink-wrap gun, and packaged... loaded onto a conveyer-belt where a machine stacks them up, 6 flats high; more machines transport them from one area to the next, finally to the warehouse, where nobody walks--but everybody rides in little forklifts, buzzing along as if in a tiny town between towering buildings of bottles, nearly colliding as one comes 'round the corner and the other slams on his brakes... it was pretty cool. They also had long glass cases holding their many awards, and gifts they'd received from people like the president of Azerbaijan, the whole soccer team Zenit, famous ice skaters and gymnasts... And then of course, we had a tasting session. Three long tables with two huge plates of byterbroads (the equivalent of a Russian sandwich), and then standing the length different bottles of beer. We passed out plastic glasses and each had a taste of Baltikas 0 - 9, Foster's and Carlsberg (which Baltika brews under license), an old Soviet-style kvas, a type of mead, and some strange beer brewed with hot peppers (called Arsenal and decorated with a pair of crossed pistols and flames). One of our Russian liasons, Natasha, told us how an old group of students taught her how to play flip-cup, and demonstrated for the other bewildered Russians. Honestly, they have no concept of drinking games here (when Neil explained them to one friend, his friend paused, and then said "It sounds like you're ashamed to drink, and need a reason;" I don't know which is worse, that or the idea I've heard that as Americans we just need to compete in everything we do).

Afterwards, Jessica, Kevin and I went to see Harry Potter 5 at Sennaya Ploshad (in a REAL mall! ..sorta). And oh! I need to talk about this movie with someone, especially because all Russian movies are dubbed and I definitely missed some of the dialogue (which means I'll be watching it AGAIN Stateside). To not give out spoilers, you'll have to highlight this part, but ONLY if you've already read Book 5: 1) I love Neville! But we never got to see St. Mungo's, which I felt was a huge part of the book... and they left out Neville's connection to the prophecy entirely. 2) Sirius's death was disappointing. I felt that it could've been much more dramatic... and, besides, Bellatrix doesn't hit him with a Killing Curse, he just falls through, doesn't he? That's why Harry has all those issues letting go. 3) Wasn't the part where they fly through downtown London excellent? 4) Thank god they gave Fred and George a decent send-off; I feel like the characters have been short-changed in the books. 5) I was so stoked to be able to understand Russian VolANdemort's super dramatic "You're a stupid boy, Harry Potter. And you will lose everything." But I don't remember him saying that... PS: In the Russian translations, "Hufflepuff" becomes "Pouff-en-doo-ee"
/end Harry Potter talk

Annnd then I went home to write my long paper, not studying as much for Grammar as I should have... but not to worry, for Nina Nikolaevna (sweetest old lady on the planet, remind me to talk about how she dropped the F-word on accident in class one day if I haven't already) is my teacher! The test was shorter than I thought, and probably more forgiving than it could've been... now I've got to prepare a monologue, get ready for a Soviet-style exam of discussion (Russian test-taking is often different... in general students meet privately with the teacher, who presents them with a stack of cards. The student then draws one at random, and must discuss whatever is written on the card. I think I'm paired with Chris, for example--and for our Conversation exam we'll have to randomly draw a topic from the teacher, and then talk non-stop about it for the next 20 minutes or so). But, before that, I'm going to have my last lunch at Samovar--tomorrow, we're having our banquet and dinner at Tinkoff's, a local microbrewery + restaurant; then Saturday we do our final exams (and Curtis comes back!), and Sunday we leave for Suzdal, Vladimir, and Moscow.
Hopefully Curtis and I will go to this seafood restaurant I found--I'm dying for good seafood, and who better to have it with than a Mainer? I think we're going to try and catch some of the Rolling Stones concert, too--at least long enough to see them sing "Sympathy for the Devil," which was written after one of the band-members read The Master and Margarita.